I am a big fan of The Big Bang Theory on TBS, but I am particularly fond of Sheldon Cooper. The character got his first PhD by the time he was 15, and he is supposed to be one of the greatest minds of all time (even if he is fictional). Perhaps my favorite part of Sheldon is his blunt honesty and childlike way of life. He says some of the funniest stuff I have ever heard, and he does so without even realizing that it’s funny. Since I get a kick out of this, I thought you guys might as well. Here is a look at some of my favorite Sheldonisms, guaranteed to make you giggle.

Wolowitz: “But you love that spot.”
Sheldon: “No, I love my mother. My feelings for my spot are much greater.”
****
Sheldon: “I can’t seem to get in touch with Amy. I tried e-mail, video chat, tweeting her, posting on her Facebook wall, texting her, nothing.”
Leonard: “Did you try calling her on the telephone?”
Sheldon: “The telephone. You know, Leonard, in your own simple way, you may be the wisest of us all.”
****
“I’m not insane, my mother had me tested!”
****
“Scissors cuts paper, paper covers rock, rock crushes lizard, lizard poisons Spock, Spock smashes scissors, scissors decapitates lizard, lizard eats paper, paper disproves Spock, Spock vaporizes rock, and as it always has, rock crushes scissors.”
****
“You went out into the hallway, stumbled into an inter-dimensional portal which brought you 5,000 years into the future, which you took advantage of the advanced technology to build a time machine, and now you’re back to bring us all with you to the year 7010, where we transported to work at the thinkatorium by telepathically controlled dolphins.”
****
Sheldon: “Is my hamburger medium-well?”
Leonard: “Yes.”
Sheldon: “Dill slices not sweet?”
Leonard: “Yes.”
Sheldon: “Individual relish packets?”
Leonard: “Yes.”
Sheldon: “Onion rings?”
Leonard: “Yes.”
Sheldon: “Extra-breading?”
Leonard: “I asked.”
Sheldon: “What did they say?”
Leonard: “No.”
Sheldon: “Did you protest?”
Leonard: “Yes.”
Sheldon: “Vociferously?”
Leonard: “No.”
Sheldon: “Well, then what took you so long?”
****
“Little Miss Grown-Ups-Don’t-Play-With-Toys! If I went into that apartment right now, would I not find Beanie Babies? Are you not an accumulator of Care Bears and My Little Ponies? And who is that Japanese feline I see frolicking on your shorts? Hello, Hello Kitty!”
****
“Ah, gravity – thou art a heartless bitch.”
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“I am the ball, my thoughts are its thoughts, its holes are my holes.”
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“That’s a false equivalency. More does not equal merry. If there were 2000 people in this apartment right now, would we be celebrating? No, we’d be suffocating.”
****
“Proxima Centauri’s the nearest star. The celestial bodies that follow are:
Alpha Centauri A, Toli, Barnard’s Star, Wolf 359, Laland 21185, Sirius A, Sirius B, BL Ceti, UV Ceti, Ross 154, Ross 248, Epsilon Eridani, Lac 9352, Ross 128, EZ Aquarii A, EZ Aquarii B, EZ Aquarii C, Procyon A.
Those are the stars that are nearest to me,
Tra la la and fiddle dee dee!”

If you’re a fan of TBBT like I am, some of those quotes had to make you laugh. They’re just too funny, especially with the way Sheldon says them. Take a break from your paralegal correspondence course right now and try to watch a few episodes of The Big Bang Theory. It may take your mind off life just long enough for you to get back in the swing of things. Have fun, and I hope to see you back again soon

The study of economics is certainly not for everyone, but someone has to learn about it. Otherwise, all of the salaries in the world are just going to be whatever the hell someone wants them to be. There is no plan to keep a country out of debt, and there is no stable way to save for times of need. That is what would happen if we didn’t have economists walking among us, which is why getting a degree in economics could lead to a rewarding career for you. Before you can determine that though, you need to know what sort of opportunities can come from this degree program. Here is an overview of econ degrees so you can decide if you want one in the future.

Different Types of Economics Degrees

When you start looking for a degree at a school like Ashford University online, you may be surprised by the number of options you have to choose from. There are several levels of econ degrees to consider, and they all have unique classes for you to look into. Common degree programs related to economics include:

• Bachelor of Arts in Political Science
• Bachelor of Science in Banking & Finance
• Bachelor of Science in Business Administration
• Bachelor of Science in Economics
• Bachelor of Science in International Economics
• Bachelor of Science in Mathematics
• Doctorate in Environmental & Natural Resource Economics
• Doctorate of Economics
• Master of Arts in Banking & Finance
• Master of Arts in International Economics
• Master of Arts in International Relations
• Master of Business Administration
• Master of Science in Agricultural Economics & Business
• Master of Science in Economics
• Master of Science in Environmental & Natural Resource Economics
• Master of Science in Statistics
• Philosophiae Doctor in Economics

Different Jobs That Come from Economics Degrees

The term “economist” is somewhat generic because that could represent anyone that works in economics. Your econ degree could lead to a variety of job opportunities, depending on what you are looking for. Some of these jobs pay better than others, but they all spawn from the same field of study. Here is a list of some common jobs you may pursue with an economics degree in hand:

• Financial Analyst
• Senior Financial Analyst
• Management Consultant
• Project Manager in Information Technology
• Business Analyst, Finance/Banking
• Staff Accountant
• Data Analyst

Different Pay Rates Associated with Economics Degrees

It is impossible to predict what you will earn with a degree in economics, but it is possible to look at the average salaries around the country to get an estimate. There are several factors that may go into determining your economics pay rate, like your location, position, and level of education. You have to weigh out all of that information to get a truly accurate view of what you can earn in this career. Here are a few salary statistics to keep in mind:

• Less than 1 year of experience: $24,511 – $62,750 per year
• 1-4 years of experience: $36,331 – $97,528 per year
• 5-9 years of experience: $41,443 – $135,858 per year
• 10-19 years of experience: $57,345 – $142,717 per year
• 20 years or more of experience: $70,986 – $182,651 per year

Is Economics Right for You?

Only you can determine if economics is the right field of study for you. If it is something you really enjoy learning about, stick with it. If you’re just doing it because you think you can make a quick buck, there may be better programs out there for you. Consider all of your options before you commit to something, and you should be able to figure out a plan for your future.

Nerds know about computers. That is just in their nature. If you are a classical geek looking for a line of work to get into, you may want to consider a job as a computer repair tech. This will give you a chance to tinker with new computers on a regular basis and help other people along the way. You could work for a company like Geek Squad if you wanted to, or you could work on your own. It just depends on what you want to do and how much money you want to make. Listed below are some tech support salary statistics that you could keep in mind as you debate whether or not this is the job for you.

Salary by Years of Experience

The amount of experience that you have in tech support will impact the amount of customers that you have and the kinds of jobs you get. This will all play into your salary in the end. Salary ranges by years of experience are as follows:

• Less than 1 year: $17,739 – $73,974 per year
• 1-4 years: $16,232 – $50,464 per year
• 5-9 years: $20,673 – $46,476 per year
• 10-19 years: $23,489 – $62,404 per year
• 20 years or more: $19,797 – $77,253 per year

Salary by Degree

You don’t have to have a degree to work in tech support. In fact, a lot of people don’t. This just gives you a chance to learn information that you may not already know on your own. Salary ranges by degree are as follows:

• Associate’s Degree: $14,838 – $58,780 per year
• Associate of Applied Science in Computer Information Systems (CIS): $21,516 – $31,200 per year
• Bachelor of Science in Computer Science: $22,000 – $55,500 per year

Salary by Employer Type

A lot of tech people like to work on their own, but there are some that end up working with large companies over time. Salary ranges by employer type are as follows:

• College or University: $19,058 – $68,500 per year
• Company: $19,666 – $55,302 per year
• Contract: $14,694 – $55,000 per year
• Federal Government: $34,590 – $45,379 per year
• Hospital: $38,000 – $60,000 per year
• Non-Profit Organization: $33,600 – $42,500 per year
• Private Practice: $24,000 – $42,494 per year
• School District: $15,080 – $59,201 per year
• Self-Employed: $11,836 – $67,916 per year
• State & Local Government: $24,886 – $61,610 per year

Salary by Specialty

Sometimes you can make better money if you specialize in one area of computer repair. That will make you an expert on a specific problem, should it come up in your line of work. Salary ranges by specialty are as follows:

• Cisco Networking: $19,265 – $63,023 per year
• HTML: $14,462 – $71,250 per year
• Linux: $21,050 – $58,705 per year
• Microsoft Access: $24,382 – $64,276 per year
• Microsoft Exchange: $24,534 – $53,901 per year
• Microsoft Office: $19,601 – $54,874 per year
• Microsoft Windows General Use: $19,449 – $54,984 per year
• Microsoft Word: $19,968 – $58,439 per year
• Network Management or Administration: $20,695 – $56,045 per year
• Windows NT, 2000, or XP Networking: $19,756 – $57,343 per year

With the right education and the right job opportunity, you should be able to make some pretty good money in tech support. If you get a degree in computer science or something along those lines, you will have an even better chance at making good money in the future. Keep all of this in mind as you assess your career opportunities, and you will be on your way to success in no time.

Pickup lines are cheesy no matter who uses them. As a woman, I can honestly say I have never been swept off my feet by a pickup line. My husband reeled me in by paying for a chi latte at Starbucks. I’m dead serious. Nevertheless, I think it’s funny to look at pickup lines and relish in their corniness. Nerdy pickup lines are even cornier than standard pickup lines, and most of them probably won’t work. Nevertheless, you can give one of these a try if you desperately want to. Maybe you can use just the right tone to make them effective.

Here is a laundry list of nerdy pickup lines that you can pull from at any time. Enjoy!

1. Baby let me be your integral so I can be the area under your curves
2. Baby, every time I see you, my cardiovascular system gets all worked up
3. Baby, let me find your nth term.
4. Baby, you make my floppy disk turn into a hard drive
5. Baby, you overclock my processor.
6. Baby, you’re a 9.999999999…but you’d be a 10 if you were with me.
7. Baby, you’re so gneiss I’ll never take you for granite.
8. By looking at you I can tell you’re 36-25-36, which by the way are all perfect squares.
9. Do you think we can make it a step more serious and disable network sharing?
10. I don’t have a library card, but do you mind if I check you out?
11. I less than three you.
12. I think my heart just lagged.
13. I wish I was an Ion so I could form an exothermic bond with you.
14. I wish I was your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves.
15. I wish I were adenine because then I could get paired with U.
16. I wish I were your second derivative so I could fill your concavities.
17. If I move my lips half the distance to yours…and then half again…and again…etc….would they ever meet? No? Well in this specific case I am going to disprove your assumption.
18. If I was an enzyme, I’d be helicase so I could unzip your genes.
19. If I were an integral, I’d fill you up.
20. If my right leg is the cell wall and my left the membrane, do you want to be the cytoplasm?
21. I’m a fermata. Hold me
22. I’m attracted to you so strongly, scientists will have to develop a fifth fundamental force.
23. It doesn’t take a genius to see how gorgeous you are, but if it did, I would be overqualified.
24. Let’s discover our coefficient of friction
25. Let’s meet somewhere. You bring your beaker and I’ll bring my stirring rod
26. Want to meet up so I can excite your natural frequency?
27. What’s your sine? It must be pi/2 because you’re the 1
28. You have nicer legs than an Isosceles right triangle.
29. You know, it’s not the length of the vector that counts. It’s how you apply the force
30. You make me want to calibrate my joystick without the latest drivers.
31. You must be auxin, cause you are causing me to have rapid stem elongation.
32. You’re so cute you make my zygomaticus muscles contract.

You know you laughed for at least one of those pickup lines. Test a few of them out and see if they do anything for you. Worse comes to worse, you can always fall back on the story that you’re a CIA agent posing as a nerd undercover. I’m sure you can get at least one drunk college chick to fall for that.

Quite frankly, I can’t turn you into a mack daddy extraordinaire. If you’re a Mac iPad-dy with a buck tooth and 15 pairs of loafers, that is what you are. Rock whatever pickup lines you need to get the girls you want, and hopefully everything works out for you.